when ur eating dinner at your friends house
and their parents start arguing
and you want to ask for the salt
but the salt is right in between their upcoming divorce
If I introduce a movie to you, and we watch it together, I’ll be spending at least 99.9% of the time watching you to make sure you are responding correctly to the film.
Told this girl to text me when she got home… I think she homeless
[at my own wedding] can I stay in the car
overhearing a conversation between strangers in which they’re saying something completely wrong and you really feel like correcting them